3000

[DruulEmpire]

I recently chalked up 3000 Addventure episodes and will be going a little over.

This is my final competitive act as an Addventurer.  From time to time I've enjoyed trying to bolster my standing amid the other contributors, but for at least a year now I've become aware of rising new prolific writers like Dragon FangX (evidently once ChaosX) and Blues32.  It is inevitable that such writers will overtake me, and perhaps very soon indeed -- but somehow I could not acquiesce to the idea of DFX reaching the 3000 mark ahead of me.  This was it, my final "surge."  I made it into the 3000+ circle and that will be enough to satisfy me.

From here on I become semi-retired.  In the months ahead there are a few collaborations I will continue to pursue, and I still haven't come close to sufficiently wrapping up the business in so many dangling threads, so there's still plenty to do.  There will simply be no longer any great urgency to this, other than not wanting to leave the occasional friend seething with suspense.

Nearly ten years ago, it was the Addventure, months before I ever properly registered here, that began to accept my crazy all-in-one-paragraph submissions when I had not yet come to appreciate the necessity of employing <, p, and >.  (Inserting porn cliches into the Google advanced search also led me time and again to Chili Palmer's stories here.)  Priorities have shifted since then, and with a ton of luck I may have even learned a thing or two about writing.  I think of Malcolm Gladwell's "outliers" theory and how it took a certain group called the Quarrymen hundreds of hours playing in some German strip club before they could go on to become the Beatles.  So remember, you read me here first.

But seriously, it's had its frustrations but it has ultimately been a blast, perhaps a far bigger and longer blast than it ought to have been.  My only hope now is that before much longer -- before March, perhaps? -- gOOber will post more than me here at the Forum and bust me back down to the rank of #6.  If this can happen, I may ever so briefly get to be #6 here and #6 in the Addventure -- and then the rankings can proceed to mutate from there.

This is as high as I dare reach, before I turn "cyco" or "bonkers" or some other such delicate mental condition.  I always meant the Empire in my name, not as some typical military-industrial threat complete with John Williams theme music, but as a kind of galactic museum, a playground of artifacts, powerful toys littered hither and yon to be discovered and tried by new waves of barbarians.  I still need to bring that museum into some kind of order, but at least I can't argue with the size of the floor plan.

addendum: to all below, thanks -- but in particular to Bonkers (by way of Adama -- thanks, Adama), I think this goes to the question of "What is porn?"  I fear that too many people pride themselves on not reading porn, with the specific self-compliment "Hey, I may not read the greatest stuff, but at least it's not PORN ... !"  But porn, I think, is relative.  I say that there are all kinds of porn, that any literature that indulges and caters to a certain desire is porn.  Thus what we take part in here is very specifically sex-porn, but that begs the existence of other kinds of porn: horror-porn, mystery-porn, police-porn, battle-porn, tech-porn, and most definitely romance-porn.  One of the more interesting descriptions I ever heard of Jane Austen was that it was "porn for girls," and having read over one woman's shoulder into a "Twilight" novel I can vouch that the prose is relentlessly purple.  It's also easy to dump on sex-porn because "Oh, it's all just about getting to the sex" -- but frankly, for many of us this is the story of life.  Yes, we honor all kinds of respectable and intellectually challenging topics, and yet at the end of the proverbial day many of us would love nothing better than to get laid.  This is all my very roundabout way of saying that no doubt ideas which cropped up here in one form or another may get recycled in any non-sex-porn writing of mine -- but still, the prose must be properly fitted to the genre and the format.  As many of us know, just because we may write less about sex does not necessarily mean we'll be thinking at all less about it.  

[Silenteye]

It's a shame I never got the chance to work with you but considering what I write  I don't there ever was any real hope of that happening... either way you will be missed... I find it funny you mention Blues32 who hasn't really been on lately... I think DragonFangX and Crazy Diamond deserve the credit of prolific writing... See you around Druul and remember 'BREAST'S WILL RULE ALL MEN!!! BIG OR SMALL!!!'

[Adama]

Bonkers posted a reply in a Comment, so I thought I'd repost it here:

QUOTE: “This is as high as I dare reach, before I turn "cyco" or "bonkers" or some other such delicate mental condition.”



The semi-retired Bonkers agrees with you’re opinion 100%, being at the 4, 0000 mark, I’m agreeable to the fact of losing it at time. Times of saying to myself, did I write these before or not? Why did I write it in the first place? Etc., etc.

Maybe that the reason The High Commander and sm semi-retired, nothing to write, with meaning that I feel at times to be true.

But, I will say Druu, one heck of a writer and should write a book, script or whatever your taste is, why waste does ten-years, when you have the material and ideas all ready written out for you, right here.

[JH_]

Congratulations on reaching 3,000!

You may find this hard to believe, but I never set out with the aim of becoming the most prolific author, though I have to admit to a warm glow when I reached the top spot. I just write for the addventure because I find it such fun, possibly even addictive. (Though I admit to going through periods when I have writer's block and it feels like hard work.) I also feel a perverse sense of duty to try to write a continuation to any reasonably good episode that someone has written in response to one of mine.

[Shendude]

Congratualtions, though I'll be sad to see you go.

[The Dodo]

Sad to see you'll be less active, you were one of my favorite Addventure authors.

[DruulEmpire]

At one time I was idly looking to wrap up my Addventuring by June, so as to observe a tenth anniversary of my first submitting fiction there.  That would have been cool and neat and simple and a little interesting -- and it ain't happening.  I'm going to have to hang on till October or November or even December to finally get my body of work to a good "place."  Besides which, I really consider my officially registering here as of March 2003 as marking my being a (relatively) serious contributor.  So if anyone was thinking "Eh, he's only got thirty-odd days left," that's been extended.  And for that matter, since this is after all the Plume, I refuse to guarantee any fulfillment of wishes, but if anyone would like to see something from me before I wrap up, now's the time to declare so.

V to JH_ below: from my standpoint it's not the least bit arbitrary.  The non-porn writing I need to get done keeps piling higher and higher, and I'll flat out hate myself if I never do justice to it.  At the same time, my writing is evolving and there's less and less it can do for me in an exclusively sex-porn outlet.  I simply can't write the "let's stick him an a crazy institute run by hot celebrities" escapism anymore that inaugurated my entry here.  There's been a certain intricate dramatic virtuosity to some of my favorite threads lately, most notably right now Shendude's Polygyny Chronicles, which begins to make me hanker after the prospect of simply writing more mainstream fiction and occasionally remembering to keep it sexy.  Your "just switch already, then" summation is highly efficient but it's just not what I'm feeling emotionally.  Truth to tell, I'll probably try to keep a few silly threads going over at CHYOO, those will always be there for me when I'm in the mood, and God willing I will always feel an occasional mood till I die.  But to keep pounding away relentlessly and copiously in the BEA Addventure, you really have to be something of a nut, reflected in names like cycozombie and Bonkers.  I give you great credit for being a talent and a gentleman, but as the most prolific author of all, who wittingly or not has basically decided that this will be your writing legacy (unless there's something you're not telling us, which I'd be fascinated to know), you may simply not be in a position to understand what's happening to me.  Libido is not a phase, I will always dabble in that as all men do, but for many of us who are trying to write, porn, or at least a concentration on porn, IS a phase.  It's been a retreat, a haven, even a bit of an academy -- but it's limited.  I stand by much of my pornography, but my epitaph can not be "pornographer."  I suspect this has in fact happened many times to many writers here, the main difference being that I'm stupid enough to indulgently blather about it and thereby drive someone like yourself nuts.  But perhaps years from now someone will read this and think "Yeah, that's about where I am too."  I almost regret mentioning numbers; the thing is, anyone who follows my Dow thread knows I'm fascinated with numerical prediction, which has usually worked out well for me in the Dow thread and is feeling pretty uncanny on this particular subject.  2013 isn't demanding an end to the Addventuring.  Rather, all my non-Addventuring is increasingly demanding 2013.

PS: another problem is that I'm no natural storyteller like Stephen King or John Grisham, it's not just a question of thinking "Now I'll write nothing but non-porn."  Right now I have back files up the proverbial wazoo, back files on plots, settings, characters, even universes.  I need those back files, to keep from embarrassing myself badly (as I sometimes do even here), and it's been neat writing porn while I keep on compiling those back files, and from time to time I take a stab at a serious short story anyway -- but there's got to come a point where the other stuff becomes at least as compelling an industry for me as this has been.  Again, I'm feeling this out emotionally.  Let's put it this way: I may simply find myself dropping the porn here tomorrow, period, no more of this introspective shit, clean break, gone and done.  That could happen.  But if I'm still pounding away in the Addventure in 2013 -- something's broken in my head.  Which may be cool for porn fans, but I'm seriously going to loathe myself.  For me porn has been an easy out.  If a man thinks he can go beyond the easy out, then he's got to.  My porn has almost always been about the most obvious kind of manhood.  The subject here is manhood of another kind.     

[JH_]

Why set an arbitrary cut-off point? If you still enjoy writing episodes, then why not continue doing so? And if you aren't enjoying it, which I very much hope isn't the case, then why not stop at once? (Writes somebody who's found himself lacking in both inspiration and time to do much writing himself lately.)

[BillPratt]

Druul...
This is SPARTA! Times TEN!

[DruulEmpire]

I've just contributed 3200 episodes, and I can tell you right now, I won't make it to 3300.

Sorry, but there will be no eleventh Sparta.

However, I do hope to get something done with Halle Berry.

[JH_]

[Silenteye]

I've just contributed 3200 episodes, and I can tell you right now, I won't make it to 3300.

Sorry, but there will be no eleventh Sparta.

However, I do hope to get something done with Halle Berry.

I don't believe this... I'm telling you right now... I do not believe that... you will hit 3300... whether purposely or not... you are a writer... and from what I can tell you enjoy what you do... if that's the case there is no way you'll stop!

[DruulEmpire]

You're right, I'll go on writing.  Just not always in the Addventure.  I may indeed hit 3300 after all -- just not this year, and don't hold your breath in years to come.  Currently I'm seeing if I can serialize something over at Epic Lust.  And there are threads I'd like to get back to over at CHYOO2.  And I'm seeing if I can pitch a major story to Duuude That's Huuuge.  I'll always be to some degree a pornographer -- I think most men are pornographers, at least in their minds, I'm just dumb enough to leave a written record of some of it.  But most importantly, like I've been saying above, my more "serious" writing will grow to overshadow this "blue" stuff.  Noone is shaming me into this, and none of this is the least bit abstract or arbitrary to me.  The time has simply come. 

[Djoser]

Sorry for going off topic, but someone told me that DE has been writing for epic lust lately, is it true?

[DruulEmpire]

That's correct.  (I don't know if I write "for" them, as my stuff is milder and slightly more psychological than their "muscles, coercion, humiliation" formula tends to get, but certainly I write "to" them and a few people there seem to like it.)  I've taken up a character of theirs named Tim Grant and decided to run with him for perhaps thirty stories (if they'll let me).  Stories thus far since this August have been "Babysitter Jenny," "Tim the Barbarian" and "Lounging Around."  With a ton of luck, "Getting With the Program" and even "'Where Do Her Looks Come From?'" could be out this year.

I would truly love to contribute something rather long sometime next year to Duuude That's Huuuge, but while I can get Mr. Duuude's e-mails, I can't seem to get any TO him anymore, and could use advice on that.

[solvegas]

Like reading your Tim Grant stories on Epic Lust but will he be getting older in following stories ? Will he then have a huge growth spurt when the hormonal changes of teenagehood finally hit ? Just wondering. 

[DruulEmpire]

Yeah, I see him as getting older.  Right now he's actually quite short, not the towering specimen that Epic Lust usually features, so I figure adolescence will add at least a foot (to his height, not ... um ... anywhere else )-- but I rather like the idea that he is already the epicenter of one hell of a lot of mischief.  At some point I may just say "Okay, you now have an idea of his adolescence" and blur straight ahead to age 18.

[Silenteye]

I can only dream of getting to your level of writing...

[DruulEmpire]

Silenteye, thank you so much, but I do believe "If you can read it, you can write it."  It may be an arduous process, to produce what others produce effortlessly, but it should still be doable.  I recommend the book "Outliers" by Malcolm Gladwell.  You put in a certain amount of sheer work, and once you get over that hump, hopefully any further work starts gelling for you.  With any luck, it's like whatever job you have.

Take a look in the rather abortive Bigguns webzine that Sadistyk tried starting out on the menu page, and after that, check out my "Paranoia" in Chili Palmer's stories (which has been taken up by Duuude That's Huuuge.)  Heck, check out some of my work in 2002 and 2003.  I may have had an imagination going, but I have to cringe at my writing.  Only after years of hammering away at this stuff am I finally beginning to feel good about plotting, pacing and (dare I even suggest this within the context of smut?) characterization.

By the way, I think imagination can get easier over time.  Don't use all your ideas at once, let some of them stew and marinade and percolate.  Heck, I actually get the occasional accusation of having a limited imagination because I like being self-referential, gamely trying to make yet another reference to something like PHRIG, a Polymeric Helium-Retaining Incremental Gel for breast implants -- but I figure, if you happen to like an idea of yours, let these "all new all the time" readers suffer a little, because, hey, you're having fun and, more importantly, your idea may finally find its proper home.  Grind out ideas, hunt for ideas, even steal ideas but give them a slightly better paint job.  In my old age, though, I at least like to fess up to who and what I stole from.  Far down the pike, I hope to get Tim Grant into a place largely inspired by the work of njaybird over at Literotica.

Also, like I've said, I will soon be DruulMuseum.  If Iraq taught us anything, it's that a museum can be raided.

V to Djoser below: amen, brother.  It's the loneliness of the long distance runner.  Only about one quarter of all my stories actually sold in the Nineties, and that was because I was damn lucky to have Dian Hanson, editor of Juggs, ex-girlfriend of Bob Crumb and compiler of a coffee table book about breasts, take a liking to me, and that only for a few years.  I know one truly excellent writer of science fiction stories, and less than a quarter of her work ever got published.    

[Djoser]

  It may be an arduous process,

It indeed is, writing is an unthankful business for beginners :/

[marktbea]

Druul,

Although I don't frequent the Plume much anymore, I have to add to this thread and congratulate you on your body of work - you've been one of the (very few) writers whose work I've specifically followed over these ten years, and I've enjoyed watching you grow -- in my estimation, at least as much as your characters have.  I wish you the best of success in whatever future writings you pursue, and hope you'll continue to think of the BEA fondly and still drop by from time to time to grace us with a tiny taste of that special flair of yours.

Mark T

p.s. Hoping you'll indeed keep on appending through the next few months, anyway!

[DruulEmpire]

Today was it.  I'm done Addventuring.

I have to say, it is very gratifying indeed to get a note from Mark T, an Old One who comes to us from out of the Before Time.  This place can't hand out any certificates or medals, but that will do.

How bizarre: I started this thread having become #6 in both Addventure episodes and Forum posts, and I'm still there.  I may stop back to see if those rankings ever mutate.

Best luck and wishes to all.

[Shendude]

Today was it.  I'm done Addventuring.

I have to say, it is very gratifying indeed to get a note from Mark T, an Old One who comes to us from out of the Before Time.  This place can't hand out any certificates or medals, but that will do.

How bizarre: I started this thread having become #6 in both Addventure episodes and Forum posts, and I'm still there.  I may stop back to see if those rankings ever mutate.

Best luck and wishes to all.

Good luck, you'll be missed.

[DruulEmpire]

Thanks, 'Dude.  By the way, I'm assured on all fronts that my next to last episode, "Fuck Death, Then What?" for Sunday the 31st, got a comment, but I can't see it.  Perhaps it's in the Tholian Web?

V to JH_ below: 622721

[JH_]

Thanks, 'Dude.   By the way, I'm assured on all fronts that my next to last episode, "Fuck Death, Then What?" for Sunday the 31st, got a comment, but I can't see it.  Perhaps it's in the Tholian Web?

If you say what the episode number is, I'll see if I can see the comment.

[Adama]

If you say what the episode number is, I'll see if I can see the comment.

There is a directory permissions problem that is blocking comments on a lot of the directories from 2009 (this includes directory 622, where Druul's ep was created).  Waiting for the sysadmin to fix it.