[DruulEmpire]

Hmm ... Granada has a blonde streak through DARK hair.  The things you'll write when you're going too quickly ...

Mech: what can I say, for those of us who have gotten used to mirror-enhanced shows, it's something you notice when it's gone ... although I'm not exactly about to boycott them or anything ...

For this year 2007, I resolve to piece together a top twelve house girls list, and of course a top twelve headliners list (if I see that many).  And now, the year-end blowoff (so to speak) --

My pessimistic nature recalled that Brandi was a bit slower and chunked out the last time, so I didn't want to raise too many hopes -- eh, but I could have apprised berk anyway.  Today was not only my early New Year's celebration but the winding down of my personal birthday celebration, and it was very straightforward entertainment today.  I got served straightaway, and after checking out some so-so dancers whome I will codename Lioness and Sandrine, I of course got in a double dance with my Kyra.  Why and how is it that I always find fresh features to admire in Kyra?  In the right light, this skinny gal is damn lovely.

A double with Kyra, and it was practically time already for Brandi.  She came out in a basic teasing schoolgirl outfit with the very high plaid skirt -- house girl Kirstie used to wear that, and I miss it.  Brandi recognized me immediately, which was nice, and she made sure to give me a good bosom smothering when she came around to me.  Brandi is so CHICK -- it was good to overhear men astounded at how hot she is.    It was basic stuff, stripping down to a thong and less, showing off her nicely (but not apocalytically) augmented breasts, rolling around on a leopard-print sheet and squirting milky fluid over her nipples and cooze, but it drew even more applause than usual.

I waited for her to come back, and I pretty much had her all to myself, so we hugged and kissed and got caught up and then I whisked her back to a booth.  Her dancing was a bit awkward -- tough but true, she could learn a thing or true from my Kyra -- but she slithered about pretty nicely and made sure to slam me in the face a couple of times with her great boobs, dear Gawd, I could chow down on those jubblies.  (It's true, Mech -- when you've alone with a body like Brandi's, it really ought to be afforded a panorama of mirrors.)  There was the slow negotion of boob-touching, and she was slyly okay with my slowly hefting and appraising and lightly squeezing her right one from behind as she sat back against me.  (If as hot a woman as Brandi could move as well as Kyra, I'd be dead -- but I'm not complaining.)

Brandi says she'll be back in April -- and meanwhile, I have Jada DeVille to look forward to at the end of January, and that I believe I WILL trumpet.  I did an advanced Google search of the phrase "Miss Nude" and caught some YouTube footage of Miss Nude Great Plains, with Jada in yellow police tape marked CAUTION.  Jada in a month ... Brandi ringing out 2006 and ringing in the spring ... 2007 isn't even her yet and it's already off to a good start ...  

[berkovw]

I ended up not making it down to the club last week.  I ended up going to Cleveland instead to see the house from A Christmas Story.  Anyway, keep up the good work Druul, I love reading about your adventures!  When I start having more, I'll put them up here.

[DruulEmpire]

Remember, Berk -- you'll poke your eye out!  Heh, and if I'm really luck at the club, my own eye is liable to get poked out ...  

Technically today was a washout -- no Dana Leigh.  But the selection of house girls really boosted today.

First up was my Kyra.  I've warned her not to be get overconfident, someday she'll dance and I'll slip her singles and that will be it -- ah, but today was not that day.  It was tempting to settle for one song -- but then the next on was "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey.  So, well, I was stuck -- great girl, great song, the artistic connoisseur in me can't pass this up.  Very nice set; I confessed to her that I'd had a very so-so New Year's and I said her dance was my belated celebration.  We talked a bit -- she wants to get out to see Eragon, she like myself digs fantasy and horror, she asked if I'd seen The Grudge and I had to say No but I'd seen The Ring -- "That will mess with your head!" I summed up and she laughed in agreement.

Pretty tame after that -- ah, but then a dancer who'd never seen the daylight before came out.  Turned out she was feeling sleepy, but she did not let on, her dance had high sexual energy.  I'm calling her Lourdes.  Like I say, my first view of her, and the moment she came out I HAD to secure a dance with her, it was one of those Kevin Spacey Meets Cheerleader Mena Suvari in American Beauty moments, but thankfully without those blasted rose **02** blocking the great view (plus, I have more hair than Spacey).  There was a slightly sad soft-edged quality around her lips and face, but otherwise she was gorgeous in a sly way.  I got a dance with her and she was very frank, forthright, direct in her sexuality.  By the time it closed down I though I might be in for another Summer Leigh moment, what with Lourdes draping herself back agaist me, sort of offer her neck to me like Dracula's next conquest, while she helped clasp her soft good breasts with one hand and swirled her hand over my zipper with the other.  She took some time re-dressing, which of course was fine with me, I got her a Red Bull and then went back to the stage.  Ye gawds, but I've got to see her again.

And I caught the end of an act by Libra, another fresh face (in my experience).  At a distance she reminded me of Iman as Sean Young's friend in No Way Out, and up close she's not THAT amazing but she still has a very stately black beauty crowned with all these lustrous black curls.  I need to see more of her, too.

So as house girl reconnaissance went, pretty successful: Lourdes is an instant star, and Libra merits further investigation.  So much for Dana Leigh.  Some gal named Tanya Taylor turns up later, she's supposed to be a fitness star -- the enduring Zasha fan in me feels obliged to come down (though she doesn't look one twentieth as ripped as Zasha did).  Everything, of course, is just one big countdown for the triumphant return of Jada DeVille -- but everything in its own good time.

[DruulEmpire]

Eh, tried submitting this and was told it's not valid, let's try again ...

SPECIAL SATURDAY NIGHT SUPPLEMENT, and I'll explain why in a moment ...

First things first: I hereby utter a Homer-Simpsonian D'OH!  Dana Leigh is NEXT Friday.  Not that I mind so much, because I still got Kyra to the tune of "Don't Stop Believing," plus that whole Lourdes phenomenon.

Anyhow, I checked the dancer schedule, and it occurred to me that this Saturday night would (or should) feature dancers of interest.  So I went down, to my first Saturday night ever there.  It was a different dynamic, more lively, more crowded at the bar while the stage had seats to spare.  You need to understand that this is not that automatic an attraction because I'm a non-driver, and commuting in and out of downtown Pittsburgh on a Saturday night is not as attractive a prospect as it might be in other towns.  But I figured, this was worth it.

I got to reassess a couple of girls.  Mavis always seemed hot to me in her pinstriped skirt getup, but out of it she was still pretty but somehow seemed quite slight, like the sliver of soap left to a bar before you pitch it.  ALternately, there was Hilly, a full-bodied and fairly bust gal with dark curls, who had a lot of enthusiasm.  So they're in a kind of limbo right now.  To get in abooth or no?  The decision may take awhile.

Meanwhile -- ah, but I should probably make another post now, so as to remain "valid."

[DruulEmpire]

I got to slip a dollar to one very sweet blonde gal, Corinne, who is now in my To be Danced With book.  Also, the awkwardness of dancing kept me away from Fallon, the one with the Mariel hemingway cheekbones, whom I've noticed myself and still want to see in action.

But I DID get Willow (see in posts above).  There was a tentative nature to her dance, she still hasn't settled into it, and she overrelied on chat, but it was nice enough.  She asked me if I was a boob man -- wow, would that more would ask that -- and I said Yes, though it's funny that my favorite dancer has no bust to speak of, namely Kyra.  That got a rapport going, because she confessed to envying Kyra and Cathedral.  (I suppose Cathedral's "pec flex" trick is enviable in its own right.)

When I came out after Willow two relatively so-so dancers were up, so I called it a night -- but not without having had a beer from a new waitress: early middle age, plump but very pleasantly so, very cheerful and jokey, and with ZOOMERS in a wide open neckline no less.  Yes, her I must see again -- and speak of the sweet she-devil herself, Kyra was there even though she wasn't scheduled.  I like how she perked up when she noticed me.  Then again, I like how she scratched my back when she scootrs past me at the bar.  Then again, I just plain like her.

And there were others on the sidelines I noticed -- like one tall near-white-blonde in a policewoman costume -- but it was time to get home.  Thankfully, the year is young ...

[DruulEmpire]

Yes, faithful readers, another Friday, another report.  Not so sure about how this 26th will play out two weeks from now, no feature dancer then -- but such a week may be perfect for reconnoitering the local house girls.  Since, however, the website keeps shooting itself in the foot, giving Monday-through-Sunday schedules yet refusing to post them till Tuesday, I may be on that prowl no earlier than Tuesday the 23rd.

In one sense this day was a bit of a washout, in terms of getting to try any new house girls.  Esmerelda came and sat by me at the bar, we chatted lightly while she had ice water, so of course I came down for her dance and had a booth dance with her later -- and you know what, now that I stop to think about it I was PURSUED today.  My fave, Kyra, was also up, and here I prided myself on making it through her set without asking for the booth.  I continue to wonder what fascinates me about her -- I caught her in profile seducing some other guy and could only shake my head.  Not really beauty, not really attitude, just some conjunction of them.  Anyhow, I sat through her and let her go -- later, she walked past me and seemed to pout a little.  For getting my back scratched in passing, that came more from the new zaftig barmaid.  But later she caught me awaiting the feature dancer (yes, I'm getting to her) and fretted over me, adjusting my scarf (I had it on more for novelty than warmth), so after coming to me and making a minor fuss over me I gave in to her and that point and had another double dance.  Which was sweet, because it turned out we shared a fantasy of going to a really bad movie, maybe a matinee feature of it on a day with bad weather, and we're alone in the theater ... and, hey, we have to entertain ourselves SOMEHOW.  I told her she's bad, and she clarified my terms, saying she's evil.  Hmmm!  But it's a NICE evil.

What's crazy about all this is that a sweet blonde soft-edged gal, Cari, came to me during her dance and promised me she'd be great in the booth -- ahh, but I'd already promised myself to Esmerelda, and she came and whisked me away.  But I've got to get back to Cari someday ...

[DruulEmpire]

So now, the feature dancer.  Dana Leigh.  Never heard of her, but she looked good enough.  I'd been planning to observe her from afar (i.e., the bar), but the audience was kind of sparse, so I decided to stay at the stage -- and a good thing too, because Dana Leigh is HOT.  We've had our long run of blondes -- hell, my favorite blonde, Jada DeVille, is due in a mere three weeks -- but Dana had a great dusky-skinned hard-bodied look with long near-black hair.  (She noticed I'm near-black myself -- my hair, that is.)

There's a stupid old movie, made in the UK< known here in the States as Prehistoric Women, and it features no less than Martine Beswicke, veteran beauty of no less than TWO Connery Bond movies, as a savage Amazon quuen named Kari.  Dana put me in mind of Martine-as-Kari, with the chiseled features and haughty cheekbones.  Turns out she's half-Cherokee -- all in all, she made me imagfine signing in at a motel as John Smith.  She was very well augmented too, not to the uber-gi-mongoid level we tend to worhsip around here, but she was no slouch, her breasts were domes peaked with very erect and prominent nipples.

So that was it -- I HAD to get her in a booth.  Her moves were a bit rough and tentative, but the beauty of her made up for a lot.  She has even inspired me to consider a first -- actually calling the club and bugging them about a repeat booking in the summer, as she would prefer to shop here in Pittsburgh rather than her usual stomping grounds, Wheeling, West Virginia(!)  I also got a Polaroid off her -- FREE, no less.

So it was a mild but very satisfying day.  Dana was fun -- she suggested that I might ask for the song "Stairway to Heaven" for a good six-minute dance.  Clever girl!    

[DruulEmpire]

It's Thursday, planning to go down tomorrow, and there's bad news and good news.  The bad: after being pretty solidly booked since circa Thanksgiving, the club is looking freed up till March.  I see Tanya Taylor tomorrow, then check my personal favorite Jada DeVille in twoo weeks, and then that's pretty much it till Zoe Britton.  The good news: I save some money and get to concentrate on house girls.

The plan right now -- if I'm up for it -- is to hit the afternoon matinee, then return that night and the following night, because the dancers' schedule says that's when I should be able to meet new girls I've yet to check out.   After that, who knows -- maybe I'll get more chance in the next two weeks, maybe not.  At least there's Jada.  

[DruulEmpire]

In the last century, America began to develop a long overdue racial **62**, which along the way gave rise to rather chauvinist (yes, it applies to more than just sex) movements such as Black Power and White Power.  Now me, I'm a white boy, my patrilineal ancestor was here before the Revolution and had his own slave, and I'm a great-great-great-great-great-grandnephew of Daniel Boone, but let me tell you, White Power does nothing for me.  What am I into?  Gold Power.

One of the better manifestoes of Gold Power thus far -- which goes to show what a Rumsfeldian long hard slog is still ahead of it -- is the movie Bulworth, in which Warren Beatty plays the titular Senator.  Suicidal, in the midst of a nervous breakdown (plus a crush on Halle Berry, so he can't be THAT crazy), he begins to rap, which is kind of pathetic, because he comes off more like Dr. Seuss than Dr. Dre.  Anyhow, he says he wants to get rid of all black people -- and all white people too.  He wants to see everyone fucking each other till we're all the same color.

Science is on his side.  There may always be -- and perhaps always should be -- distinct types of people, but I happen to look forward to the rise of a "mongrel" golden people who look like they all came from Polynesia.  I fantasize that enough centuries in the future most people -- and in particular most women -- may look like Tia Carrere in her heyday as Juno Skinner (her True Lies villainess) and Sydney Fox (her Relic Hunter heroine).

I blather like this, because while today's feature was a classically blonde beauty named Tanya Taylor, who I got a dance from, she wound up being "bookended," clear out of the blue, by two fine testaments to Gold Power.

But already this post threatens to become "invalid," so allow me to break all this down for you ...

[DruulEmpire]

So I come in and leave the first dancer go, and then I perk up as I see Sydney for the first time, I had noticed her on the lists but had no concept of her.  From afar I though she was black, a very mild black, but as I allowed myself to get drawn up to the stage (the stage stools were crowded today -- maybe guys just seeking out some extra warmth as winter finally kicks in) I found myself getting more of a Mariah Carey vibe off her, and I had to wonder if she was part Asian.  Anyhow, she was very athletic, moved very well, had small but still quite desirable breasts.

Later, they doubled up one dancer I'd been a bit rough with in my critique, Harriet, with another I had only been able to glimpse in passing named Linda.  Harriet has long blonde hair, and though her face is rather sad (in the "set" of it more than her attitude) she is also very athletic, has a decent body and has some sinuous moves, so now I'm thinking, Maybe table her for later.

But it's Linda who grabs my attention.  With lustrous widow's peaked black hair, big dark eyes, a faintly dusky color to her, a stud directly below her mouth, and a body that is borderline chunky but still nice and smooth and exttemely active, Linda looks fine enough but positively bubbles over with fun and attitude, and here too, I'm thinking, Someday the booth.

Now, cut ahead to just after Tanya Taylor's dance (don't worry, I'm saving her till last).  I'm standing away from the stage.  Sydney walks over, notices me, makes a minor fuss of noticing me all alone and everything -- so that's it, I've got to get a dance off her ...

[DruulEmpire]

Sydney is oddly shy when I get her back but she is a good sport and chatty but not in a way that is at all grating.  I wonder where she hails from and she says San Francisco, though she's also been to New York, which she loves.  She likes to travel, and I'm glad she made it to Pittsburgh.  Watching Sydney I get a sense of sampling a very wide variety of women all in one, and I know I have to see her again sometime.

But what's really funny (sorry for the Tarantino-like editing here) is that just after I've had Tanya's dance and I'm getting my coat on and getting ready to face the world once more, I notice Linda wandering from man to man.  She obviously wants a dance, and I could save her the trouble with guys who just can't pony up, but I get a mild kick seeing her talk up one guy and then another and still get nada.  Finally, she comes to me and I play at hemming and hawing -- maybe I'll go, maybe I'll stay -- but of course, the booth.

My blackhaired Linda has a good sense of play.  I seem to entertain her easily: with my facial expressions, my scarf, my comments, all that.  "You're fun!" she comments with a note of surprise.  So of course I have to double the dance, and into the second one she's back against me, grinding away nicely, while I get to clasp her breasts, and for a second there I like to imagine I can recreate that whole great Summer Leigh sensation (see above) -- but we get close enough.

So Sydney and particularly Linda livened up my day, two "golden" girls to the blonde headliner.  And oh, as for her ...

[DruulEmpire]

Tanya Taylor come from out of fitness, Ironman and all that, in addition to Penthouse and Playboy, and I can see it.  She's not ripped, but once she gets her rather oddly themeless costume off you look at the shoulders from time to time and you see a little extra power there.  Fine "pectoral" development, but of course those are some very nice implants.  Twice -- TWICE -- in her show she picks me out and drags me forward and buffets my face with her knockers.  She is one total package, so of course a dance.  I wait for her, get snagged by Sydney (see immediately above), then when I come back out she's at the corner with her photos'n'all, ready to go.

Booth time with her in sensational.  She grinds against me, damn near smothers me to death in her boobs from time to time, the works.  No woman may ever quite be my Jada DeVille, due in just two weeks, but Tanya makes her mark.

Eh ... maybe in another minute any actual conversation will come back to me.  All I know is, no sooner did I get a dance and a Polaroid from Tanya than Linda stepped up and hit me up.  Between the two housegirls and Tanya giving me a good smothering twice during her stage work, I had that great feeling of being PURSUED once more.

It was a marvelous day -- so marvelous that I'm dropping any plans to return tonight and tomorrow, I'm sated and don't want to jinx anything.  But I may wander back throughout next week, and the week thereafter, before Jada's triumphant return.  The selection of girls, it's looking better all the time.

[DruulEmpire]

Okay, so I lied.

I went right back this Saturday night.  It looked like the optimum lineup of dancers, as many as five names I was interested.  Barely met any on that list -- but I lucked out in other ways.

So I get my IC and two gals sitting across from me tease me about my mysterious book.  It is in fact my journal -- a journal of notes that I keep on these very outings, but I don't volunteer all that.  Because it's a big black handbook, some women have worried that  it's a Bible, so I at least reassure them that no, it's not.  Anyhow, one of the girls waggles her boobs at me but she's just taunting and I've no idea what she's saying, so I leave that slide.

And a good thing too, because I notice this one gal with very smartly cut platinum blonde hair and a nicely matching black ensemble complete with high shiny black boots.  (I said yesterday was "bookended" with "golden" girls; tonight, I was "bookended" by blondes -- but ah, patience.)  We make eye contact, she comes to sit by me and we chat awhile.  Turns out I'm early for the evening shift, and she's knocking off and oh, she's debating whether to just leave, oh, if only something interesting would happen ...  Well, I've already been thinking "Get her in a booth!" since the second I saw her, so off we go.  I call her Martha (try decoding THAT) and as Eurotrendy as she looks gives a very soft, sweet, talented dance, with a nice sinuosity worthy of the great Kyra (see above), and I get to cup her good-sized breasts.  So, boom, Martha's got me off to a flying start.

I come back out and catch the tail end of one intriguingly haughty-face beauty, Columbia, with long red hair and most of all some REAL movies, she twitches her whole body all over the stage like a damn dervish.  Yes, Columbia I must have later.  Also there was a darkhaired woman of interest, wearing a top of skull-and-crossbones over each breast (a Pirates fan?) called Antonia, I may check her again later.

Next, among some so-so dancers, I get to be reuinted with some "great hits of yesterday" -- and I mean literally yesterday in the case of my favorite transplanted San Francsiscan, Sydney.  She's with another dancer, but even with anohter dancer on stage I keep looking far down over at her and getting good eye contact with her.  Sydney is so damn HOT, she walks around the place in a simple too-short white pullover and she just illuminates the place.  Also good to see Willow again, she seemed a bit tired and sad but perked up a little recognizing me.

Now, get this -- I'm running out of singles.  I made it home just now with only six to spare.  I've never felt so naked -- though what can I say, I was at that stage for nearly two hours, more than my usual.  So I figure, may as well get in a booth dance -- but with who?

At last, a dancer of interest from my list turns up -- Corinne.  Not the best mover and shaker, but such a beauty.   Imagine Tara Reid sober -- except I think she's BETTER than Tara.  Shallow bosom, but she makes the most of it.

I ask her for a dance, but it takes a while because they stick her in that dopey side cage after her set and then she has to wait for the next girl.  Plus, our time together is a bit of a comedy of errors because we're hearing this whole loud argument between a DJ and some dancer who showed up 45 minutes late, though she refuses to believe that -- anyhow, Corinne is so lovely and sweet and patient, and she smiles and laughs very agreeably.  She's relatively new at this, but she gives off such a great vibe that I go triple.  She's a native Pittsburgher, but I inform her she's a classic California girl -- but we won't tell California, we'll keep her Pittsburgh's secret.

And that was that, a highly successful Saturday.  So bring on a week with no feature dancer -- I feel ready.

[DruulEmpire]

I want Heidi.

So who's Heidi?  let's backtrack:

The new dancer schedule came online this morning, and it occurred to me than any comprehensive hunting down of house girls of interest was going to involve going out tonight or tomorrow.  So I made it tonight.

So I'm just sitting there, nursing the ritual beer, when this HAWT honey-brunette woman in a nice long clingy dress made eye contact with me and sat right by me.  This was Heidi.  I commented on her voice, and she said she was German.  Evidently she travels a lot, but for some reason  -- praise be to God -- she likes Pittsburgh.

I like to think that Heidi may not really have any idea just how supermodel hot she is.  She has the chiseled features and the killer smile -- so of course I had to get her into a booth without even checking her stage work (which I did later) and she had this nice HUGE natural breasts -- and what was more, as she danced she actually GUIDED my hands onto her body and breasts.

I wanted to BUY Heidi.  I wanted to OWN her.  But a few dances had to suffice.

The evening was rounded out with two blondes, one highly energetic gal named Chryssi who I don't remember being on the list before, another a kid with a vague Kirsten Dunst cast to her face, she goes by Estee and loves to pretend she's singing during her private dance.  I promised her a microphone next time; who knows, I may actually scrounge one up some day.

But the night was Heidi's.  Feature dancers -- beware!

[DruulEmpire]

Rumor had it that tonight was supposed to be Big Boob Night.  However, that may have been called off, as I didn't see anyone unusual.  I wonder if it's simply a special amateur night -- or if things don't really get underway until 11 PM or some such time.

Anyhow, tonight proved weirdly sweet.  There I am, having a beer next to a Scotsman (wild how a strip bar makes Pittsburgh feel particularly international, practically as much as Carnegie-Mellon University does), when I see Kyra coming off stage and I wave to her.  As is all too typical in that place, I'm half-deaf with the music going, but she comes over and gives me a kiss, then chats up the Scot, who's saying something to the effect of "you wear a skirt and I'll wear my kilt."  He's actually a pretty polite bloke, but she has to defer when he says she's extraordinary.  "I'm average," she insists, and then she asks me something and I answer "You're above average" and she looks ticked off and turns and goes from me.  Hmm!  So now I'm concerned, so I wander after her to the other side of the bar, and in time she notices me again and I say I'd like a dance and she says "I asked you and you said No" and I said "No, I said you're above average" and that seems to bring back her spirits.

I'm not sure she knows how to handle a compliment.  I tell her I've had about fourteen other dancers but none of them move like her, and she's got no answer for that.  The hell of all this is that she's a very sweet girl trying to get by and raise two [censored] by her lonesome.  She has two boys and she wants a girl -- no husband, no man, just a sperm donor.  Naturally, I volunteer, and she cackles "I'll strap you down!"  But after the dance we just sit and talk a long while, and I notice our hugs and kisses are a little longer and less perfunctory than before.  Fact is, this woman is as close as I've ever come to actual ROMANCE in my life.

Eh, but I don't think she's thrilled about Jada DeVille coming next week.  I'll be sure to talk about that as that  comes up.

Kyra left, and I met Heidi again.  The great duality: on the one hand my geeky scrawny breastless wonder Kyra, who has so much heart, and this chiseled chestnut-haired Teutonic beauty Heidi with the gi-mongoid juggs, like she's Uschi Digard stepping straight out of the Seventies.  Seriously, one of these days I've got to become tech-savvy enough to give this Archvie a look at her.  But Heidi is nice and polite enough but a little mercenary, while Kyra has so much heart it hurts.  Would that I could be Seth Brundle and put the two women in a telepod and create the ultimate mate.

A sweet night, but emotionally exhausting.  Maybe I'll go down again Saturday night.  Maybe.