[Blax12]

 Granted but the guy you are allowed to kick is Chuck Norris...plus you are dressed like a bad guy...

I wish he is not hurting you too much.

Blax12  

[Young_Ross_Meyer]

Granted! but to channel the rest of the anger that he didnt inflict on mofopoo he starts to take it out on you, and begins kicking your ass in the process...

I wish I worked for Dakarti Lorenz(however its spelled) and was seeing Nadine and Milena on a daily basis and also getting paid.

[TheZookie007]

Wish granted. You are now the newest janitor for Daktari Lorenz's company, working the graveyard shift. Hey, look on the bright side: at least you get to see Nadine and Milena every day...on the posters on the wall in the office.

I wish that Chuck Norris was appointed as the new U.S. Secretary of Defense.

[Theodore]

Granted, however now all defensive strategy involve Round House Kicks.

I wish that I knew how to dance.

[TheZookie007]

You are hereby appointed to replace Sara Evans on "Dancing With The Stars".

I wish that they would take the US version of "Big Brother" off the air and replace it with the UK version so that we could be seeing women stacked like Saskia all the time.

[solvegas]

Granted. Unfortunately you go blind and see nothing.
I wish I was richer than Bill Gates and Warren Buffett combined ( therefore I'd be a chick magnet without trying too hard ).

[herringbone]

Quote:
I wish I was richer than Bill Gates and Warren Buffett combined ( therefore I'd be a chick magnet without trying too hard ).

Granted.  After a sudden and catastrophic stock market collapse, you move ahead of Bill and Warren by virtue of the fiver you just found on the sidewalk.  Good luck with the chick magnet thing.

I wish Krispy Kremes were health food.

[Theodore]

Granted, and you are now considered thin at 250 lbs.

I wish that I knew how to fix all the problems in my life.

[G_I_John]

Granted, here's a hammer and a stool

I wish I didn't get rained on today

[herringbone]

Quote:
I wish I didn't get rained on today

Granted.  We'll only keep you locked in a closet until midnight.  A very waterproof closet, I might add.

I wish oxygen would somehow become an aphrodisiac to women.

[G_I_John]

Granted, but it becomes poisonous to men

I wish Keisha could get her 10000cc boobies she's dreamed of

G_I "HA, make that have an unfortunate outcome, I dare ya."

[herringbone]

Quote:
I wish Keisha could get her 10000cc boobies she's dreamed of

G_I "HA, make that have an unfortunate outcome, I dare ya."

Granted.  She orders the 10,000cc wonders, and the doc says they come in a case pack of 12 and he has to charge her for all of them since he doesn't have any other requests for that size.  She agrees... and tells him to put them all in since she's paying for them.  Now she can't get out of the clinic.

(Okay, maybe there have been more unfortunate outcomes than that)

I wish someone would offer to buy my house for a ridiculously large amount of money.

[MunchWolf]

Granted, it's Solvegas, with a 5 dollar bill, after the stock market crashed

-Munch "damn irony" Wolf

I wish people would stop complaining when people misuse the word 'irony'

[robclassact]

Granted, the standards of education are lowered and technological progress screeches to a halt now that people are perplexed by any text which requires higher than a first grade reading level.

I wish I had a free subscription to the BEA.

[G_I_John]

Granted, here's your free pass to Bald Eagles Anonymous

I wish I had Solvegas's $5

G_I "Or is that Solvegi?." _John