bwaaahhhh!
Q: How many facial expressions if Dolph Lundgren capable of? That would be one!
A: Yeah, but it's a fantastic one. If I could make my face look like Dolph Lundgren, there would be no other experessons needed.
Q: How many decent movies has Dolph Lundgren been in? That would be one!
A: Dolph Lundgren was in lots of great movies. He was in Rocky IV, and Masters of the Universe, and Universal Soldier (with fellow action i-con JCVD) Red Scorpion, Pentathalon, and that movie with Brandon Lee, where Dolph plays the asian guy and Lee plays the white dude.
Q:How pathetic was Dolph Lundgren's frozen food isle monologue in Universal Soldier? Utterly pathetic!
A: It was the best frozen food isle monologue in the HIStory of celluloid, unless you count the private contractors on the Death Star scene in Clerks.
Q: How gay was Masters of Universe? Completely gay!
A: What's wrong with gay? Gay means happy, and happy means gay. That's why gay people are so much fun. Besides, Masters of the Universe was slightyly less gay than 300, and everyone loved 300, starring the dreamy Gerard Butler.
In all seriousness, anyone who does not like Dolph Lundgren must have some sort of self esteem issues. Just know that, no one is expecting you to be as good as Dolph Lundgren. You fine just the way you are; unless there I guess if like we were picking teams for kickball, and I would be like, "I pick Dolph Lundgren!" And then the other captain would be like, "No fair, You got Dolph Lundgren last time!" Yeah, I guess I could see in that instance a slight resentment of Dolph Lundgren's Dolph-Lundgreness... You see what I just did? I used Doplh Lundgren's own name to describe him, because it's the only way I could possibly encapsulate all of the splendor than is Dolph Lundgren.