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Ninjaturtle

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Re: Depression
« Reply #45 on: February 24, 2016, 04:43:46 PM »
I can't move out, I don't have enough income nor anyone else who'd take me in.
So I'm effectively fucked over.

Turns out this guy isn't into her so that's .. good? but here's the thing: there will be another.

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Robin_K2

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Re: Depression
« Reply #46 on: September 11, 2016, 07:13:50 PM »
Bumping this so new members will know there is a resource here; a lot of us are willing to listen, and help when asked.

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Ninjaturtle

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Re: Depression
« Reply #47 on: September 11, 2016, 11:55:30 PM »
Yes, definitely. I hadn't had a bad episode in a long time and just the other night I was SUPER low. Had to call a hotline.

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Robin_K2

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Re: Depression
« Reply #48 on: September 12, 2016, 12:26:01 PM »
Feel free to share, Ninjaturtle.

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Ninjaturtle

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Re: Depression
« Reply #49 on: September 13, 2016, 05:11:49 PM »
That's about it. I had a bottle of booze and it all went to hell. Luckily the lady on the phone (1-800-273-8255, her name was Sue) and the support of my friends on FB, I got through unscathed.

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Robin_K2

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Re: Depression
« Reply #50 on: September 13, 2016, 05:29:27 PM »
Yeah, alcohol is like gasoline on the fire of depression. Glad you reached out and got help! It's never easy to do that.

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Ninjaturtle

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Re: Depression
« Reply #51 on: September 13, 2016, 08:08:36 PM »
Before I knew it all the stuff that makes me sad was spiraling down

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rtpoe

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Re: Depression
« Reply #52 on: September 13, 2016, 10:07:28 PM »
The TRUE Superman understands...

http://imgur.com/gallery/Ijdxh
rtpoe

Winter teaches us about detachment, numbness.  But it’s a way to get through.  From winter we learn silence and acceptance and the stillness thickens.
-  Gail Barison, The Winter Solstice of my Soul

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Ninjaturtle

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Re: Depression
« Reply #53 on: September 14, 2016, 12:01:22 AM »
That's a great piece

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Ironbeard

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Re: Depression
« Reply #54 on: December 25, 2016, 11:05:23 AM »
Been braking my body at work for weeks. Finally have time off to heal. My hands are wrapped so I can RICE. Taking my meds and just trying to sIeep as much as I can. Not celebrating any holidays this year. My reasons to celebrate are gone. I tried to talk thing out with my family but they are selfish, tackless and think everything is a joke. I had a shimmer of hope I could relax and heal my mind too when I came home from work. Only to see my parking spot given away and the device that would help me relax finally after weeks of waiting was stolen from me by my brother.

There have been more upsetting thing since yesterday and before but it comes down to this. I want to die. I don't want to live anymore. I've been clean for 12?years since my last failed attempt. So I'm not go do it. I'm still stong enough to stop myself. And if I'm not I have the suicide prevention hotline website abd phone number. For now. I'm going to lay on a couch. Taking my pills hope to become uncønscious soon. Just so tired. With everything.
« Last Edit: December 27, 2016, 05:20:55 PM by gonZo »
When angry count four.  When very angry, swear.---Mark Twain

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Ninjaturtle

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Re: Depression
« Reply #55 on: December 25, 2016, 01:09:23 PM »
Keep your chin up. This is a hard time for everyone, you're not alone, and you are valuable.

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Robin_K2

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Re: Depression
« Reply #56 on: December 25, 2016, 07:10:00 PM »
Been braking my body at work for weeks. Finally have time off to heal. My hands are wrapped so I can RICE. Taking my meds and just trying to **82** as much as I can. Not celebrating any holidays this year. My reasons to celebrate are gone. I tried to talk thing out with my family but they are selfish, tackless and think everything is a joke. I had a shimmer of hope I could relax and heal my mind too when I came home from work. Only to see my parking spot given away and the device that would help me relax finally after weeks of waiting was stolen from me by my brother.

There have been more upsetting thing since yesterday and before but it comes down to this. I want to die. I don't want to live anymore. I've been clean for 12?years since my last failed attempt. So I'm not go do it. I'm still stong enough to stop myself. And if I'm not I have the suicide prevention hotline website abd phone number. For now. I'm going to lay on a couch. Taking my pills hope to become **61** soon. Just so tired. With everything.

I'm in recovery myself. Thanks for sharing.

I've been suicidal a couple times. Pal actually checked in with me a few times. He was very nice. Pedonbio once had problems, too. So let we BEAers pay back some of the help we've received. That goes for anyone out there.

The holidays suck, of course. You are not alone.

I'm on four kinds of medication. I hate them. And you can sure as hell bet that I take them every day! (Some of them three times a day.)

Unless you're on one of the older meds, such as lithium, you're probably on a serotonin re-uptake inhibitor.  In short, you have to create the serotonin in the first place, or else medication won't work. Ways to do this include working out, sex (with another or -- ahem -- alone), laughing and, for me, playing a musical instrument. Whatever makes you happy even momentarily -- then the meds can kick in.

Alcohol elevates serotonin, but afterward your levels fall even lower. I might as well drink poison.

I'm sure you've heard the old saying, that "There's the family we're born with, and then there's the family we choose." Friends and such. It took me a long time to learn a simple lesson: That I should hang out only with people who are nice to me. Some people are just toxic, make me feel bad about myself or are just snots.

In A.A., in chapter five, we would say these people are merely "spiritually ill." I like that idea very much, because it is so Christian. And incredibly condescending.  ;D Anyway, fuck 'em. And not in a pleasant BEA way.

Finally, it's a cliche, but it's also true:

Depression is not a sign you are weak.
It's a sign that you have been strong for too long.


So treat yourself! Movies, ice cream and chocolate (really; sugar is chemically close to alcohol, without the bad effects), porn, jumping jacks -- whatever works! I find strip clubs to be enormously useful.  ;) Or hell! Just find a Hooters!

Maybe an A.A. meeting? Call in sick to work if you want. Because you are sick. You need to first take care of yourself and get well again. And you will. Meanwhile, would you go to work if you had pneumonia? Of course not. So be selfish. It's allowed! And remember, this is just temporary.

And please check back with us? You are not alone. You are a part of this community and we take care of our own.

« Last Edit: December 25, 2016, 07:14:07 PM by Robin_K »

Re: Depression
« Reply #57 on: March 14, 2017, 09:29:45 AM »
Finally, it's a cliche, but it's also true:

Depression is not a sign you are weak.
It's a sign that you have been strong for too long.


Very true.

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Robin_K2

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Re: Depression
« Reply #58 on: November 19, 2017, 03:29:22 PM »
Because the holidays are fast approaching, I thought I would bump this thread.

If you're hurting -- many of us here want to listen. Just listen. We are a pretty varied bunch, and it could be that someone here has been through something similar. Or maybe not. And maybe that doesn't even matter.

We are here.

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bignatslover

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Re: Depression
« Reply #59 on: November 21, 2017, 01:03:55 PM »
Because the holidays are fast approaching, I thought I would bump this thread.

If you're hurting -- many of us here want to listen. Just listen. We are a pretty varied bunch, and it could be that someone here has been through something similar. Or maybe not. And maybe that doesn't even matter.

We are here.
That was a thoughtful thing to write, thank you.  If you can accept a moment of randomness, I was being wistful recently and thinking how I'm approaching the age of fifty, which in and of itself can hurtle one into deep cosmic thoughts.  I am constantly pondering whether I have been ambitious enough in life vs whether I should have tried harder to scale the corporate ladder.  After all, most of society only remembers people who reached the very pinnacle of their professions, and yet most wiser people point out that fulfillment in life is less about corporate success and more about personal triumphs including loving the ones close in your life and staying true to your core ideals. 

Any thoughts?