This is the sort of topic that always gets my attention and when you said "discuss at your leisure" I just had to jump in...
I put this out for discussion before:
For those who want to follow the whole thread it is here in the forum at
Your BEA opinion welcome. It am very surprised by the reactions that women have to other women in terms of their chest. The degree to which these reactions run can be very extreme and in a few cases become destructive to the relationship.
If one just tosses two women together the casual observer is typically compare the two. Being social animals we are always scanning the environment to ascertain the “status” of the group, even if it is a “group” of randomly clumped women in a photo. This is interesting but not all that gripping. I find the entire emotion and reactive aspect that something as basic, and I might add uncontrollable, as natural breast size has on longer term relationships and personalities.
I do not want to get very analytical (however tempting) but I have seen many different interactions from a wide range of people whenever a disparate breast situation has occurred. It has tended to fall into four camps -
My Groups of Long-Term Woman to Woman Disparate Breast Interaction
(groupings that occur outside a monitored environment, e.g. classroom, clinic, office)
Group 1 - “The breast of both worlds” or the “I’m OK, you’re OK let’s revel in our uniqueness grouping”. This is by far the most healthy relationship that typically comes out of a situation of mutual appreciation of each other as friends. Regardless of the number of women involved, so long as they each possess a healthy self confidence, a comfortable “pecking order” is left understated and breasts never become an issue.
Group 2 - “The ignore the elephants in the living room” or the “You’re so lucky to have (or not) those things”. This is what I have seen the most of, especially between just two ladies - where a direct comparison is nearly automatic. Depending on the personalities and the circumstances this can range from a nearly reverential compliment to an envious resentment. Breasts have become an issue but it can run both ways, big wishing for small, small desiring big, small despising big, etc...
Group 3 - “The weapons of mass distraction” or the “Those things are out to get me”. This is unfortunately the second most common type of grouping that I have run into. A variant of group 2, it has degraded to the point where one or some of the group have internalized their reactions to the point where they begin to drive the entire evolution of the group dynamic. In other words, individuals start to act on their feelings and feel justified or can rationalize it to the point of acceptance. Unlike group 2, group 3 will have teasing, jokes, embarrassment, or other acts of “sabotage” to the group. I should point out that not always is it a case of the “have not” going after the “have so”.
Group 4 - “The scarlet letter” or the “We use a different part of the alphabet than you”. This is the rare but unfortunate downgrade of group 3 - ostracizing an individual. This is still a group because the isolated individual is not “removed” from the group but rather put into a state of perpetual example. They ironically become necessary to the larger or dominant aspect as a reminder of what it is that makes them unique. Again, breast size simple needs is to have relative difference and also there is not big over small or small over big prevalence.
I could mention some cute anecdotes but I have said my bit here for today.