[picktin]

... you are so fixated on an exterior quality, be it sexual or nonsexual, about your potential spouse that you overlooked all the other things that are necessary for a harmonious relationship....

I respect your interpretation of desired traits in a mate, but when you use terms above like 'fixated' and 'overlooked all the other things that are necessary' - that points to an addict. I'm not saying you are. But I know that I am.

A (flat-chested) stripper that I am friends with, points out how backwards what I'm trying to do, is.  I'm trying to find someone who fits a whole slew of character and physical attributes, who will both fall in love with me and also let me make her boobs super-huge.  Definitely addict behavior.

Of-course, as my recent ex points out, 'true love' is from within and has no conditions - most certainly not physical appearance.  However, as a female she either doesn't recognize, or doesn't understand (appreciate?), just how powerful and important a physical attraction can be to the male.

This whole discourse (boobs, and more specifically - B.E via breast implants) - leaves me feeling anxious and ultimately depressed. It provides such a 'high' but the high is fleeting and temporary.  I guess my problem is that I got to live the dream for 9 years, taking the high for granted, and it was recently pulled from me.  Now I'm chasing it.  Addict.

[ned1212]

You're right picktin, I may not be an addict. As far as your addiction, would a slow, imperceptible yet very real long-term weight gain, keeping things very much on the increase ... work at all for you? 

[MasterDragonfly]

Of-course, as my recent ex points out, 'true love' is from within and has no conditions - most certainly not physical appearance.

It's been my observation as a member of the human race for half a century that this concept is a fantasy, one which writes romance novels.

Were it easily attainable, then you could spin the wheel of fortune (with 330 million options on the wheel, or ~7 billion, depending on where you want to take your chances) and promptly love the person selected for you. Regardless of context. Completely opposing political and religious viewpoints would be irrelevant.

Divorce rates in excess of 50% (for first-time marriages) wouldn't be happening. The divorce rate would be zero. Divorce as a concept would exist in the realm of the hypothetical.

There would be no war, we'd be too busy loving everyone unconditionally. How could you shoot at someone you loved?

Conclusion: Don't hold yourself to such high standards.

[pedonbio]

It's been my observation as a member of the human race for half a century that this concept is a fantasy, one which writes romance novels.

A loud "AMEN" from the somewhat older section.

[ned1212]

I am happy to say, it was a temporary hiccup.  I am as happy as can be.   My humble advice to young people: Make sure you marry a woman who "breaks your cookies".  Eyes, hair, skin, boobs, whatever it is.  Even as those features age, they still bring you great joy when the going gets rough. 

[pedonbio]

I'm glad you got past the bump in the road. One of the really big things in relationships is that they change, and change os a damn hard thing to get used to.