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MaxBigfoot

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3330 on: July 25, 2020, 01:05:18 AM »
No words needed.

That's one of the cleverest versions of that meme I've ever seen.   ;D

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MaxBigfoot

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3331 on: July 25, 2020, 02:27:56 PM »
Clean up!   ;D

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rtpoe

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3332 on: July 27, 2020, 06:23:08 PM »
OK, grammar nuts:

A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.

A bar was walked into by the passive voice.

An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.

Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”

A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.

Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.

A question mark walks into a bar?

A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.

Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get out -- we don't serve your type."

A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but hoping to nip it in the bud.

A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.

Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They depart.

A synonym strolls into a tavern.

At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.

A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.

Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.

A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.

An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.

The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.

A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned a man with a glass eye named Ralph.

The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

A dyslexic walks into a bra.

A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.

An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television getting **92** and smoking cigars.

A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.

A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, **94** to forget.

A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the bartender nearly chokes on the irony.
rtpoe

May we make wise choices in how and what we harvest,
may earth's weather turn kinder,
may there be enough food for all creatures,
may the diminishing light in our daytime skies
be met by an increasing compassion and tolerance
in our hearts.

-  Kathleen Jenks, Autumn Lore

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MaxBigfoot

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3333 on: July 27, 2020, 06:27:56 PM »
I had to look some of those up to get them, rtpoe.  A nice chuckle.   :D

V I wonder if there's anything underneath, or if it's flyers all the way through?   ;) :o

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solvegas

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3334 on: July 27, 2020, 08:59:43 PM »
I wonder if there's anything underneath, or if it's flyers all the way through?   ;) :o

That could be very dangerous to continue to rip them off since they are the only things probably holding that pole together.  ::) ;) ;D

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MaxBigfoot

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3335 on: July 28, 2020, 05:18:34 PM »
I wonder if there's anything underneath, or if it's flyers all the way through?   ;) :o

That could be very dangerous to continue to rip them off since they are the only things probably holding that pole together.  ::) ;) ;D

It would make one heck of a torch!   ;)

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MaxBigfoot

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3336 on: July 29, 2020, 06:11:17 PM »
Hey sol, you ever do anything like this?   ;) :)

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solvegas

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3337 on: July 29, 2020, 08:23:48 PM »
Hey sol, you ever do anything like this?   ;) :)

Yes. We called it swim call. Normally done in tropical zones, it was a way to not only air out the boat but to allow us to get some sun rays for health. Not all ports can support a nuclear submarine and so we would drop anchor near the coast in shallow water and enjoy the warm weather and crystal clear water like in Tuvalu for example.  :)

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TheZookie007

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3338 on: July 29, 2020, 11:20:16 PM »
Nice work if you can get it!
AOC, HC, TW, BO, KH: FU. FUATH. 100x.

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TheZookie007

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3339 on: July 29, 2020, 11:27:22 PM »
Meanwhile in satirical news:



LBCBlogs, 10 July 2015: "Animal Behaviorists Agree Kim Kardashian Was A Goat In Past Life"

In an effort to raise awareness on the plight of Walia Ibexes, the Alpine Ibexes cousins – now critically endangered - Kim Kardashian posed in a manner similar to that of the mountain goat, demonstrating her softer, more environmentally-conscious side.     

The derriere-driven star took to the French countryside, armed with a pair of conscious stilettos, eco-friendly platinum locks and a nude body suit and posed on a mountain of earth, defying the dangers involved with coming into direct contact with dirt. 

Animal behaviorists on site explained that her pose, which mimics the goats may serve as a trigger for mating, hence saving the declining Walias species.

"She has genuine concern for goats," they explained, "she thinks she may have been one in her past life."         

Ibexus Aurelius, the Ibexes official spokesgoat expressed gratitude to the star and dispatched a trip to tend to the needs of all those involved in the photoshoot.

Reports say he cancelled a busy schedule involving a salt licking expedition in the European Alps where he was also due to discuss means to save the Walias, now numbering at a few hundred.

We cannot but thank the KUWTK star for the monumental efforts in raising awareness on environmental, social and humanitarian issues.
AOC, HC, TW, BO, KH: FU. FUATH. 100x.

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MaxBigfoot

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3340 on: July 30, 2020, 06:05:47 PM »
^ I just laughed myself sick for half a minute reading that, Zookie!   ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

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TheZookie007

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3341 on: July 31, 2020, 04:26:57 AM »
Glad you liked it :)
AOC, HC, TW, BO, KH: FU. FUATH. 100x.

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MaxBigfoot

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3342 on: July 31, 2020, 04:59:05 PM »
A simple, easy to understand, traffic sign system.   :)

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CarlTL

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3343 on: July 31, 2020, 08:26:52 PM »
Where ever you go, there you are.

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solvegas

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Re: Anything random? Throw it into this thread.
« Reply #3344 on: July 31, 2020, 09:22:17 PM »
A simple, easy to understand, traffic sign system.   :)

It's so screwed up that it must be in California.  ;) ;D ( To paraphrase George M. Cohan, if I said something that insulted you, I'm damn glad I did.  ;D Grouch Marx used it also )